Broken

So, here we are again.  Some days I hate blogging – especially about personal stuff.  I really don’t like it in seasons like this: Dry seasons.  And I’m in the middle of one.  In some ways it feels like I’m being a bit of a whiny git – and maybe I am.  But in other ways, blogging is one of the few places where I feel able (or perhaps comfortable) to let my emotions out a little. I’m an introvert, and so there is safety in the written word.  Even when I know 20 people are going to read it, or that anyone who wants to can have access.  Kinda silly, but it’s the way my mind works;  So I hope you don’t mind.

I forgot to do what I said last week.  I forgot to be careful.  And I have reaped the reward, in some small way:  My joy is minimal;  My emotions are just knackered;  My tiredness is pretty high –  And I just don’t know how the next six weeks of term are going to work.  But He has been good to me.  He has kept me going, through thick and thin.  His grace has never been insufficient.  And that’s where I’m at.

Broken-hearted I come
My cup is empty, my mouth is dry
See how quickly I fall
Burdened with darkness
Heavy in lies I want to cry, but I can’t
I try to stand but I fall down againI need You to carry me
I need You to carry me
I need You to carry me
When I am weak

O this can’t be enough
To just say I’m sorry, to confess my fault
When I’ve hurt You so much
And now I am asking for You to do more

I want to cry, but I can’t
I try to stand but I fall down again

I need You to carry me
I need You to carry me
I need You to carry me
when I am weak

I’m always weak…
When I first met you I drew you in close to me
Your weaknesses covered with strength and security
I’ve never left you, nor will I ever leave
Child believe, child believe

But you are strong…
When I first met you I drew you in close to me
Your weaknesses covered with strength and security
I’ve never left you, nor will I ever leave
Child believe, child believe

I need You to carry me
I need You to carry me
I need You to carry me
when I am weak

Carry Me – Jenny & Tyler – Faint Not – Copyright 2010 One Eyed Cat Music (BMI)
Music and Lyrics by Jennifer Somers (BMI) and Tyler Somers (BMI)

Here it here.

In my brokenness, God shows Himself complete.  In my feebleness, He shows Himself strong.  Against my foolishness, His wisdom shines out.  And in my dependency, He is sufficient.

I love it when I remember that I don’t care.  I can be broken, weak, foolish and utterly dependant.  I don’t need to worry about masks or opinions.  I’m free!  And I hope that you are too.  Free to live in the joy of His love.  Free to live for the approval of only One.

That’s where I’m at.

Soli Deo gloria (Glory to God alone!)

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